i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
