I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
