i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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