my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
