I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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