I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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