He kissed a someone with a penis
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
