if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
