I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
