You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
