I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
