the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
