guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
