Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
