I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Randomize
