Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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