They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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