the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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