okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
she peed on how many people?
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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