would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
