You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
The police scanner is talking about you again....
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize