On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
