either way he was missing a nipple.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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