The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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