NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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