My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Randomize
