I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
do nipples grow back?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
