I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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