what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
