Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
