Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
