Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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