dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!�
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
