I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
