woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
