Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I just forgot I was standing up.
Randomize
