dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
