She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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