Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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