He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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