plz talk dirty to me
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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