We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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