Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
