In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
If I had your ass I would rule the world
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
