She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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