Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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