Where is the hickey?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize