I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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