If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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