Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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