What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
We're like a lot better than the average bears
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Randomize
